It's my pity party and no you're not invited

No life is not great.....in fact it sucks.

But I'm the one that it supposed to keep it all together.  To keep everyone organized and on-track.  The one who is supposed to continually perpetuate the idea that everything is great. 

Well guess what?  I'm human and it's not great all the time and trying to make everyone believe it all the time is emotionally taxing.  So today I broke down and it's my pity party.

Maybe if I put all the bottled up things inside me down on "paper", I can relieve some of this pressure.

First of all, don't call me and don't try to talk to me about it.  I don't want to talk.  I just want to cry and get it all out of me. 

I am just so tired of trying to be perfect all the time.  My house is a disaster.  My body is a disaster.  Our staff is a disaster.  And lately everything I try to do perfectly comes out like a disaster.  No matter how much I look at stuff -- it seems like there's something wrong with it.  There is NO TIME to do the important stuff that we need to get done.  Every day is filled up with trying to get the most important stuff done.

There is too much to do ALWAYS.  There is never any free time.  We get up early and go to bed late and try to cram in as much stuff as we possibly can into 24 hours. 

I've lost myself.  I have no identity anymore.  I'm just the Pizza Zone back up person.  The person that always has to sit on pins and needles waiting for that phone call to come in and cover because some idiot can't do their job correctly or because someone decided that they wanted a day off....so to hell with Pizza Zone.  We have no life........we are the slaves of our employees, our business, and our customers.  What little tiny morsel that might be left at the end of the day is ours.

So if this sounds like a pity party......well it is.  And I sure as heck deserve one.  There's so many things that I need and want to get done......but NOPE -- Pizza Zone comes first.  Pizza Zone always comes first.

But what about me?  I have needs too!

P.S.  This blog no way reflects what my husband is doing.  He has a very full plate and no time whatsoever.  In fact, if he was a girl -- he'd probably sit down and cry with me all day today too!  Oh wait.....there's no time to sit and feel sorry for ourselves......we have work to do!